Conflicts between in-laws are not a new phenomena. In fact, three out of every four married couples report significant disputes with their in-laws. However, this particular MIL (mother-in-law), SIL (sister-in-law), and FIL (father-in-law) may well set the standard for “The Worst In-Laws of All Time.”
The trouble began when they referred to their daughter-in-law (DIL) as their son’s “best friend” rather than his wife. For a while, the pair couldn’t figure out why they would use such a disparaging phrase. That is, until the husband and his father had a disturbing talk, which revealed the reality. Devastated and attempting to understand the betrayal, the wife went to the internet for help on how to deal with the situation.
A distraught woman resorted to Reddit.A 26-year-old lady recounted her experience, leaving many people bewildered and frightened. The OP went by the handle faxxed, and she really wanted others to offer her advise on her complicated relationship with her in-laws. Later, the woman posted an update to her narrative, prompting many people to question the sanity of her family members and sympathize with the desperate wife.
The woman began her narrative by saying: [edited] “My husband Robbie and I married earlier this year. Two months after our wedding, we celebrated my birthday at my in-laws’ place. We were all seated in the living room when my SIL received a phone call. When she answered the phone, her friend inquired as to her current activities. To my surprise, she said it was her ‘brother’s best friend’s birthday.'”
The OP found this weird, and she did not expect it, especially after their wedding day, when both sides of their family showed so much love and support. The woman wrote, “I had never heard anyone call me Robbie’s best friend. I am his wife, and we were previously engaged for more than two years. Hearing my SIL refer to me in that manner confused me considerably. I always call her my SIL, and I expect her to do the same. Perhaps even as Robbie’s wife, but certainly not best friend.”
The OP confronted her SIL but did not receive any clarification.The woman wrote, “After my SIL hung up the phone, I asked her why she referred to me that way. She didn’t appear embarrassed. She just answered, “Well, you are best friends!” And that’s what Mom and Dad call you (referring to MIL and FIL).
The OP was surprised by such behavior. Though she and her sister-in-law were not particularly close, they were always kind and respectful to one another. The woman explained that the two of them had never had any disagreements or conflicts. They didn’t spend much time together outside of family occasions, though, because their personalities were so different. But the woman was confident that her SIL had never given her any reason to believe she was upset or annoyed with her.
The woman says, “I decided to let it go that night, even though it freaked me out. But then everything happened again a few days ago, which is why I’m writing this piece. The unusual relationship had an impact on the OP’s professional life as well. The OP admitted that this was not the first time her in-laws named her a peculiar “best friend” name. The woman stated, “My mother-in-law and I both work in the same field and do similar duties, but for separate companies in the area. When we have clients who switch, our companies occasionally coordinate.”
“That happened this week, and I had to attend my mother-in-law’s office to assist a client with a transfer. My mother-in-law was in the office, so I came by to say hello. While I was there, she presented me to her colleague, and I was once again baffled as to how she did so. She declared, ‘This is my son’s best friend!’
While shaking hands with my coworker, I halted and clumsily added, ‘I’m his wife…’ My mother-in-law smiled and did not respond to the colleague’s confusion.
When they were alone, the OP questioned her mother-in-law why she addressed her that way. Her husband’s mother, like her sister-in-law, did not appear to find it weird. She simply determined that OP and her husband are best friends and there was nothing to have a fuss about.
OP has numerous theories on the causes of this weird behavior.The woman stated, “The only way I can think of to explain this is that in my vows to Robbie, I promised to continue being his best friend. Nobody seemed to think this was unusual or out of the ordinary, and I believe vows are a fairly regular practice.
So I’m not sure why Robbie’s family seems to be so attached to it, unless it has nothing to do with everything. I’ve also discussed this with Robbie, who is baffled by it. He asked his parents personally about it, and they gave him the same response they had given me.”
“It all feels like mocking conduct to me, but I’ve never experienced this from them before. Are they calling me his best friend because they dislike the fact that I am his wife? Is it an inside joke they’ve been having without me? I’m not sure what to do or think about it, especially since the in-laws seem to dismiss it when I bring it up. Yes, I am Robbie’s best friend, but I am also his life partner and DIL/SIL. “I’m not sure what to do.”