Some people say that their mother or their daughter is their best friend. And it might seem like a perfect scenario for the already very close bond between a mother and daughter. However, this kind of relationship that looks great at first could actually have negative consequences for both women!
We like and admire families who love and support one another. However, it appears that there should be a distinction between a healthy connection and crossing certain lines. Sharing secrets, talking about issues, and providing emotional support are all part of being friends, especially best friends.
This relationship must be mutual, but for a mother and her daughter, it would be unhealthy. A child should not be burdened by their parent’s worries, nor should they believe that the roles have been reversed and that they must perform as an adult for their parent.
While friends can also create boundaries, they’re different from the ones that should be created by a parent. If you set a rule, your child needs to understand it has to be followed. In a friendship, you wouldn’t be allowed to enforce such rules and tell another person what to do. You need to be your daughter’s authority figure and show that you’re in charge, otherwise, you’ll become a “permissive” parent, which can cause your child to develop poor self-control.
As your daughter grows older, she should learn to take responsibility for her actions and make her own decisions. Your role as a mother will evolve over time. A friend’s role, on the other hand, is more fixed. With time, one friend isn’t expected to become more independent of the other. As a result, if you act as a buddy, your daughter may find it difficult to adjust to maturity.
Being too close to your daughter might prevent her from developing a personality that is separate from yours. Normally, she would observe both you and her peers, as well as other people she knows, and “collect” different personality traits, thoughts, and opinions from different people.
But if you are both her mother and best friend, she might not learn to form her own opinions or develop her own identity.Being friends might be good for both of you for some time. But you might end up relying on this friendship too much. And if you ever have a big fight that puts a strain on your friendship, it will also transfer to your relationship as a mother and a daughter, and it can be hard for you to do a good job as a parent.
Do you agree or do you think there’s no harm if a mother and daughter are friends? Are you friends with yours? How has it affected you and your relationship with them?