“I’ve heard people say, ‘After having a kid, your marriage will never be the same.’ So, guess what? You are correct, and that is precisely the purpose. The birth of a child will reveal the true nature of the relationship. If your marriage is based on emotions rather than a conscious choice to love, it will suffer…a lot.

When you’re operating on little sleep, food, and so on, you’re not going to feel particularly loving. Surviving the infant period, for example, requires more than sentiments. I can’t even picture being a toddler or having a second child—it requires more than sentiments!!!

If your spouse wasn’t ready to commit, you can be losing out on luxury meals, getaways, and alone time. You may feel as though you lost out on your prime years. This may eventually drive you to resent your partner. While I understand that all of these things are lovely and that dating is really essential, my husband and I are looking forward to sharing all of these experiences with our kid.

We’re all for appreciating each season when it arrives. We may go on a date by ourselves one day, but for the time being, we don’t see the necessity. While our kid rests and sleeps, we have lots of late evenings. We’ve done everything, and pizza and movie evenings seem delicious right now. It’s what keeps our love tank full.

I’ve seen marriages dissolve with the birth of a child, as well as others flourish with the same life-altering event. What’s the distinction? Let me make a suggestion: Perhaps the marriage was already on the verge of falling apart.

As previously said, a newborn will just accentuate what was or was not already there. Raising a child is difficult and can bring out the “ugly” in anyone…trust me, I know. I thought I was hormonal throughout pregnancy, but the fourth trimester was something else entirely. That said, it needs a solid foundation to keep moving ahead when your patience is challenged on a regular basis.

Having a kid has been one of the most wonderful experiences my husband and I have ever had. I’ve never felt more loved and admired than I do right now. Some people moan about a lack of intimacy, but I’ve never experienced closeness like I do now: the intimacy that comes from seeing a person in their raw and real essence and falling in love with them even more.