I’ve never celebrated Valentine’s Day with my husband. On our anniversary, we don’t send each other cards. I can’t remember what he got me for Christmas, this year or any other. However, when an ice storm hit last week, he canceled all of his meetings in order to care for our children. He encouraged me to leave my job as a nurse because he believed in my writing ability.

He adored my body at over 200 pounds and every weight in between. We may not swing from chandeliers or swoon over each other on social media, but he never leaves a room without first asking what I require. Love isn’t always sexy; it can also be boring. It is unqualified support. ‘Real, sane, mature love—the kind that pays the mortgage year after year and picks up the kids after school—is founded on affection and respect, not infatuation.’

Men, pay attention. Women would trade every box of chocolates in the world for a text message at 10 a.m. reminding them of their value. Love someone in the smallest of moments. Not just when the calendar says so.