6 Things To Remember If You Decide To Mess Around With A Married Man

Olivia Pope made affairs appear seductive. However, most people are fortunate to survive them. I’ve always been instructed to avoid married men. But why is this so?Who would want to be associated with a man who has his life in order and desires children? How frequently do we see that in men our age? Now, before you start calling me a slacker, please hear me out. I never recommend dating a married man, especially if he has children.

However, sometimes you don’t know and other times it’s just heated. There’s the scandal, the intrigue, and the reality that something so wrong can feel so perfect at the same time. The truth is, it isn’t love, and he isn’t your Prince Charming. It’s simply infatuation and a desire for something you can’t — and shouldn’t — have. So you think a ring is a dead giveaway and you should flee the moment you see one, right? That is entirely right. However, hardly every man wears them, particularly on business trips.

You best believe that if you’re a hot 20-something at a business conference, you’ll get stares, and guys will try to pick you up whether you like it or not. Nothing will stop a guy from trying to pick you up if that’s what he wants, whether he’s married, single, divorced, or in an unhealthy relationship with his cat. Some men are searching for a fling and will not wear a ring. The difficulty is, how can you know if he isn’t wearing his wedding band?

To be honest, sometimes you don’t, and you take a chance. I spent a nice evening with a guy who didn’t wear a ring, and I didn’t realize he was married with two kids until later. I wanted to kill the jerk. Sure, that was one of the hottest moments of my life, but I felt awful and filthy afterwards. He not only lied and deceived me, but he also harmed those he ostensibly “loved.”

I couldn’t fathom how someone could do it until I considered something: What if he needed the escape? Yes, he chose to be married, he chose to have two lovely daughters, and he must be a man. But does that make him any less human? I understand that many guys stare but do not touch, but image being in a loveless marriage and sticking it out for the sake of the children.

While I agree that infidelity is never an option, I can see why pursuing a younger lady may be enticing. We all have problems in life, and some of us find solace in books, exercise, or spending time with loved ones. What if our loved ones are the folks we need to get away from? Do we forego human interaction with others? Do we ignore our physical requirements? I’m sure we’d like to think so, but if we can’t, here are six things to consider before dating a married man:

I wanted to kill the bastard. Sure, it was one of the hottest experiences of my life, but I felt horrible and dirty. Not only had he lied to me and fooled me, but he also hurt people he supposedly “loved.” I could not rationally understand how someone could do that until I thought of something: What if he needed that escape? Yes, he chose to be married, he chose to have two beautiful girls, and he needs to be a man.

Does that make him any less human, though? I understand a lot of men look and don’t touch, but imagine being in a loveless marriage and sticking through it for the kids.While I agree that cheating is never the answer, I can understand why running after a younger woman would be appealing. We all have things we struggle with in life, and some of us escape with books, exercise or being with loved ones.

What happens when our loved ones are the people we need to escape from? Do we deny ourselves human interaction with others? Do we defy our physical needs? I’m sure we would like to think we would, but if we cannot, here are six things to remember before getting involved with a married man: 1. It is (and should be) a one-time thing. You must never see him again. You came, you saw and you conquered. Move on.

2. He will never leave his wife. No matter what you think, marriage is a bond, and you’d have to have a magic vagina to break that up. 3. You do not want to be a stepmom. You can barely take care of your student loans and apartment. Are you really equipped to handle dirty diapers and hours of “Dora the Explorer?” I think not. 4. You will close yourself off to other relationships.

If you’re chasing a silver fox, you can’t see the strong sexy bear in your backyard. 5. He’s been through real-life experiences that you haven’t been through yet. You’re always going to be on two separate pages, no matter how proud you are of raising your goldfish. 6. The sex is good, but it’s empty. He is thinking about his wife when she was younger while he’s sleeping with you. He’s thinking about what she’d think, and whether or not she’d divorce him. You are just a body.

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