Criticizing someone’s work is never easy, especially if the person is a family member. Daniella, intending to promote her sister-in-law’s new business, asked for a cake for a special event. Unfortunately, the results were disappointing, leading to a violent confrontation. Daniella approached us for assistance on how to handle this challenging situation.

Here’s Daniella’s letter: I was in charge of the cake for my parents’ 30-year anniversary. My mother-in-law recommended I buy it from her daughter’s new baking business, claiming that “family supports each other!” I agreed and got a picture of the $400 cake.On the day, I was startled to discover that it looked nothing like the picture. I replied: “I won’t pay for this disaster!”

When my husband saw it, he turned to me and said, “It’s not a big deal, I will pay!” I mentioned we had 20 guests coming, and now the party is destroyed due to his inexperienced sister’s poor job. I insisted that he not give her a dollar because she abused my confidence. He clarified:

“If you want to humiliate my sister like this, then I will humiliate you by not accompanying you to your parents’ big party tonight!”So this is what occurred. Not only did I bring an awful cake to the occasion, but I also went alone and had to deal with everyone’s concerns about where my spouse was. I’m still really angry. Was I wrong to behave in this manner?