On a dismal Monday morning, a man calls his boss and says, “I’m so sorry, boss, but I’m down with something dreadful. I worry I’ll have to take the entire week off to recover.”

The boss responds, “We’re swamped this week, and I really need you on board.” When I’m feeling under the weather, I find that kissing my wife from behind does wonders. “Perhaps you should try it.”

That afternoon, the employee phones back, feeling optimistic and re-energized, saying, “Boss, your counsel was invaluable! I’m feeling great right now. I’ll be at my work tomorrow at 9:00 a.m. sharp.” The boss exclaims, “That’s excellent news! I will see you then. The worker goes on: “Oh, and boss, just so you know, your bedroom decor is absolutely stunning!”