“Mom, my boyfriend invited me to go out.””My dear, he will take you for a drink, then to a hotel, where he will caress you, remove your clothing, and get on top of you to make love. “If that happens, I’ll die!” The next day, the mother inquires, “How was it?”

“You were right, he took me to a hotel, caressed me, undressed me, and when he tried to get on top of me, I told him: ‘NO CHANCE.'” “Well done, my girl.”
Four married men are fishing. After a while, everyone starts bragging: “You have no idea what I had to do to come fishing! I promised my wife I’d paint the entire house next weekend.”

“She didn’t let me come until I promised to replace all the tiles around the pool.” “You folks are whining about small matters. I had to agree to renovate the kitchen, which included replacing all of the kitchen appliances. And so they kept fishing until they realized the fourth man had not said anything.

“Hey, you, don’t try to make us believe you didn’t have to promise anything!” “So, I set the alarm clock to ring at 3:00 a.m., and when it did, I approached my wife and whispered in her ear, ‘Do we make love or do I go fishing?’ And she responded, ‘Dress well!'”