James had smelly feet. They stank.  In fact, they were so nasty and made him feel so embarrassed that he thought he’d never be able to marry. Mary had chronic halitosis. Her breath ponged. She was so self-conscious that she held a handkerchief in front of her mouth. One day, James and Mary met. They began their courtship without knowing each other’s issues.

James never removed his shoes, and Mary never took her handkerchief out of her mouth. They married. On their wedding night, James was in the bathroom. He had brought a variety of products to treat his stinking feet, and after cleansing and deodorizing, Mary was ready to use the restroom. She was also concerned, so she had brought a variety of mouth fresheners and mints to assist her breath.

Mary was in the restroom when James realized, to his dismay, that he had left his filthy socks behind. There seemed to be nothing else to do than acknowledge his stinky feet. Mary was thinking the same thing. “I must tell him about my condition right now,” she reasoned. She opened the restroom door and there stood James.

“I have something I must tell you,” she blurted out. “I know,” James whispered, nearly passing out from the odor of her breath. “You’ve eaten my socks.”