1. Devices and Passwords. When it comes to exchanging phone, computer, and gadget passwords, Lash says it really depends on what works for the individual pair. “It’s up to the culture of your relationship,” Lash tells Bustle, adding that whatever feels right is what’s right. “Relationships are about being connected to each other’s world while also respecting individuality and privacy,” Lash argues. While she does not believe that having all intimate conversations with your partner is beneficial, she does believe that it is vital to examine each other’s sentiments if there is a dispute or contrasting values and comfort levels.
2. Bathroom Habits & Space. According to Lash, the level of comfort when it comes to sharing a toilet or bathroom habits is individual. “Some people may grow up with many siblings or limited bathroom space and do not have as strict a privacy standard when it comes to bathroom habits, whereas others may grow up with the ability to use the bathroom privately and rely on that privacy to feel comfortable.” Or one of the couple’s members may have grown up in a family culture that emphasizes openness and did not enjoy it, resulting in a desire for more seclusion in their adult lives, or vice versa.” Lash elaborates. That is, there is no rule of thumb for determining what is and is not appropriate in the bathroom.
Some couples enjoy brushing their teeth together, conversing while one person is on the toilet or in the shower, while others prefer to keep their bathroom activities private. “It’s important to discuss your comfort level with your partner — it’s not about saying you should be able to go to the bathroom in front of your partner, it’s about discussing what is and isn’t comfortable for you both.”
3. shavers. It may appear to be harmless, and we’ve all done or considered it in a pinch when there’s only one razor in the shower, but Sonpal tells Bustle that “borrowing your partner’s razor for a quick touch up could spread not only bacteria, but also more serious blood-borne pathogens like hepatitis B and C.”
4. nail clippers. Because most people don’t clean their nail clippers on a regular basis, an unintentional nick could result in significant consequences. According to Sonpal, you can “spread hepatitis C, fungal, and bacterial infections” with nail cutters.
5. Friends and Social Activities. While Lash believes that “mutual connections can be ideal,” she also believes that couples should spend time alone with their friends. That being stated, nothing is officially required when it comes to splitting up or sharing your social lives as long as both people are comfortable with the breakdown. Lash is only concerned with extreme situations. For example, “regularly excluding your partner is not acceptable, but having separate social lives to some extent is.” The goal, according to Lash, should be to develop social practices that feel fair to each partner.
6. Deodorant/antiperspirant. You probably don’t consider your armpit to be a bacterial zone, but Sonpal claims it is. “Swapping germs from one armpit to another is as simple as borrowing someone’s deodorant.” Deodorants are less dangerous to share because they typically contain alcohol. The alcohol makes your skin acidic, making it less appealing to microorganisms. Antiperspirants are a different story since they often contain aluminum, which stops sweat pores rather than bacteria.” So, if you use antiperspirant, never, ever share it. According to Sonpal, it’s one of the most germ-infested items in your medicine cabinet.
7. Earphones. Though borrowing headsets may appear to be safe, Sonpal advises Bustle to reconsider. “Earwax is natural ear protection, but earphones trap the once-harmless bacteria in the wax.” Any wax that accumulates on headphones attracts and feeds this bacterium, potentially leading to infections.” That is, you should clean your own headphones on a regular basis and obviously keep them to yourself.